I’ve been reflecting for days & days around posting a “Merry Christmas” message here, to share with you all & didn’t end up posting anything as didn’t want it to be….just another Merry Christmas message to be lost in your timeline or newsfeed.

The message that landed for me was actually a question:


For you see, my childhood memories of Christmas haven’t been ones I’ve looked back on over most of my life with a great deal of fondness.

Christmas would start in our household as you would expect Christmas might, the tree would go up, Mum would invest her time into trimming it beautifully & would set about creating the menu for the family feast (which by no means was a feast compared to the glutinous we tend to experience today) but living on the land meant we lived off it in the best way we could storing things throughout the year so we could celebrate.

The presents would get wrapped & on Christmas Eve we’d all get to open one from under the tree, Santa would visit through the night & we’d wake with the excitement most children do on this much celebrated day around the world.

It would somehow start to turn somewhere on Christmas Eve when my step-Dad would start drinking….this would continue right through the afternoon into the night & continue onto Christmas Day & by Christmas Day afternoon me & my siblings would then witness this turn into a violent display with entire Christmas lunches, dinner settings, glasses & bottles being thrown at my Mum as she was cowering against a wall or in a corner somewhere.

We never understood why…

Other than the harping by Mum as to how much alcohol my Step-Dad had drunk & this would send him into a rage.

The emotional violence of cussing – harsh mean words that would soul destroy my Mum.

Then the physical violence – the punching, the hitting, brute force.

The shouting.The deep rooted sobs.The screams & cries for help. More abuse.

With the last memory usually being loads of screaming & shouting followed by the front door slamming shut & my step-Dad starting the car & sliding out of the driveway & up the gravel road at a million miles per hour – never to be seen for the rest of Christmas – sometimes for up to 2 weeks before he’d slowly & silently arrive back home as if nothing had happened.

I know I’m not alone with these memories.

In fact I’ve been a little quite on here this Christmas as LYBL always experiences an influx of calls & cries for help at this time of year – because for so many – Christmas is not all that it’s cracked up to be.

We have been going from call to call & person to person in an effort to make a difference.

For so many people this time of year can be a time of fear, isolation, realisation & sadness.

We have been serving those in their time of need & working with them to instil new ways, new beliefs, practical solutions & resourceful ways forward.

It’s the greatest gift of all.

I have realised so many life lessons from each & every one of our members who have reached out & have gained new connections with those I’ve been meeting for the first time.

States of survival for so many people at this time of year is actually quite common – they are seeking love & connection – seeking ways to claim back their power & move forward with a system or structure that works for them…..sustains them in ecological ways….now & for the future.

They are reflecting on their year & desiring / wanting their life to be different as we prepare for a new year ahead.

The child with the ‘shitty’ childhood memories gets it completely…. whilst at the same time has also “got” the lessons.

Life will always come down to what you make it mean.

Life will always come down to the attitudes, beliefs & values you decide for yourself.

Life will always come down to what your own version of success means.

Life & going after your dreams is the realisation that you are worth making progress for.

I continue to always realise that everyone has their own “shitty” story & version of their own reality.

So as we opened up our LYBL doors & phones this Christmas to give our gift of time & love to those who may not have been experiencing their version of their best Christmas – I realised that my “shitty” childhood memories have become my greatest gift towards understanding & meaning.

I’ve learnt that a human with a dream will not be denied & that success to me means the realisation of constant progress towards my own dreams that will uplift & serve others in life & business now & long after I’ve left this planet.

We want LYBL to be a constant source of love, support, compassion & joy for people to come “home” to, where the campfire is always lit & where everyone’s best life can be found within them once more.

So….a little belated I know….but….Merry Christmas everyone….

May your 2018 be the time you decide that your life lessons are & have always been a blessing that have enabled you & propelled you onto achieving your greatest hearts desires.

Allow each day to be a stepping stone forward.

It’s worth the pain…the shadowland was designed for us to experience all that exists in the light.

And I’m very happy to say that my Christmases are now very different – I’ve designed, created & am living them the way I desire them to be.

Keep moving forward….it’s so worth it ????


MICHELE & the entire LYBL Team



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